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"Want to know what kind of sounds a space turkey makes? Ever wonder what games monster children play? You'll find the answers to these silly questions in this book. From Valentines Day through Christmas, you can keep your family and friends ho-ho-ho-ing throughout the holidays with these great jokes. Additional features include a table of contents, informational sidebars, a phonetic glossary, a fun-facts section, critical-thinking questions, sources...
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"How do dinosaurs pay their bills? With Tyrannosaurus checks! What should you do if a dinosaur sneezes? Why, get out of the way, of course! These are just two of the dinosaur jokes that will have you laughing and rolling on the floor until your stomach is, well, saurus. Additional features include a table of contents, informational sidebars, a phonetic glossary, a fun-facts section, critical-thinking questions, sources for further research, and an...
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Bestselling Author of We're Just Like You, Only Prettier and Bless Your Heart, Tramp
Hang on to your hats! We're in for some fiercely funny weather and crackling-sharp observations from Celia Rivenbark, of whom USA Today has said, "Think Dave Barry with a female point of view."
With her incomparable style and sassy southern wit, you'll hear from Celia on:
--The joys of remodeling Tara
--How Harry Potter bitch-slaps Nancy Drew
--Britney's To-Do...
5) Animal jokes
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"Did you ever wonder what the difference is between a fish and a piano, or what you call a sleeping cow? Young readers will enjoy a clever and creative selection of riddles and jokes related to four-legged, feathered, and finned creatures. Additional features include a table of contents, informational sidebars, a phonetic glossary, a fun-facts section, critical-thinking questions, sources for further research, and an index"
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Smarter than a history teacher, funnier than the Founding Fathers, and more American than Alaska, an almost (but not entirely) comprehensive primer on American history (or at least, the good stuff). Chapters include interactive worksheets, and the book features a selection of "best of" lists, such as the 10 most notorious mobsters and 7 most corrupt presidents.
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In the New York Times best-selling book from the creator of the wildly popular webcomic xkcd, Randall Munroe gives hilarious and informative answers to important questions you probably never thought to ask.
Fans of xkcd ask Munroe a lot of strange questions. What if you tried to hit a baseball pitched at 90 percent the speed of light? How fast can you hit a speed bump while driving and live? If there was a robot apocalypse, how long would humanity...
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Packed with fun-filled illustrations, easy-to-follow exercises, and sample jokes, this humorous how-to joke book for kids proves that with a little elbow grease, anyone can write jokes that really make people LOL. Covering everything from surprise to wordplay to visual jokes--plus tips on how to perform a joke so it lands--LOL 101 is the approachable and (of course) funny guide for any kid ready to channel their inner comedian.
10) Try Not to Lol
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"Filled with puns, knock-knock jokes, and hilarious one-liners, this collection of sidesplitting gags is sure to get the whole family laughing. Perfect for young comedians, class clowns, and jokesters of all ages"--
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Your future is...limited! Wait, we mean...limiting... No, hold on...limitless. Sometimes your first steps into the "real world" send you falling flat on your face. It's natural to be optimistic about new experiences, but most of us set ourselves up only to be let down every time. And disappointment hurts like a $%&*#. News flash: You don't have to be an Einstein to survive adult life. You don't even have to abandon your standards to get what you want....
14) Tom Jones
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Tom Jones, by Henry Fielding, is part of the Barnes & Noble Classics series, which offers quality editions at affordable prices to the student and the general reader, including new scholarship, thoughtful design, and pages of carefully crafted extras. Here are some of the remarkable features of Barnes & Noble Classics:
• New introductions commissioned from todays top writers and scholars
• Biographies of the authors
• Chronologies of contemporary...
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Paper Moon meets the Blitz in this original black comedy, set in World War II England, chronicling an unlikely alliance between a small time con artist and a young orphan evacuee.
When Noel Bostock-aged ten, no family-is evacuated from London to escape the Nazi bombardment, he lands in a suburb northwest of the city with Vera Sedge-a thirty-six-year old widow drowning in debts and dependents. Always desperate for money, she's unscrupulous about how...
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A new collection from David Sedaris is cause for jubilation. His recent move to Paris has inspired hilarious pieces, including Me Talk Pretty One Day, about his attempts to learn French. His family is another inspiration. You Cant Kill the Rooster is a portrait of his brother who talks incessant hip-hop slang to his bewildered father. And no one hones a finer fury in response to such modern annoyances as restaurant meals presented in ludicrous towers...
17) Sh*t my dad says
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Tuesdays with Morrie meets F My Life in this hilarious coming-of-age book about a son's relationship with his foul-mouthed father by the 29-year-old comedy writer who created the massively popular Twitter feed of the same name.
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"What won't we try in our quest for perfect health, beauty, and the fountain of youth? Well, just imagine a time when doctors prescribed morphine for crying infants. When liquefied gold was touted as immortality in a glass. And when strychnine--yes, that strychnine, the one used in rat poison--was dosed like Viagra. Looking back with fascination, horror, and not a little dash of dark, knowing humor, Quackery recounts the lively, at times unbelievable,...
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"Lewis turns her trademark humor to ordinary events that work her nerves--from people who wear t-shirts with indecent images to public displays of affection in the plumbing aisle of Lowe's--while keeping a wry eye on herself and her own temptation to vent grievances "like a teenage girl in overalls and Birkenstocks.""--
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